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The reasons why you have already quit your resolutions for this year.

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On my first day at work after the holiday vacation,  I walked into the office kitchen at lunch to discover  my overly motivated colleagues chopping away salads and discussing very determined about given up smoking in the New Year.

This is what you probably have encountered as well, no further than two weeks ago… The first weeks of the year are the steam engine weeks. We burst with energy and enthusiasm for our New Year’s selves; that are always skinnier, healthier, more productive and so, so successful.

Leap in time to January 21st 2014, just 2 weeks after the blissful resolution on the first  Monday of the New Year. Same day of the week, Same office at lunch time smells now intensively like meat and potatoes. The smoking room is full and crowded beyond its capacity. I throw a look inside and to my astonishment I find there the same colleagues that were swearing cigarette abstinence for the whole of 2014 just at the beginning of the months.

What happened? Where did the smoke free, salad lovers persons from the beginning of the year disappear in less that a month?

What happened is actually no secret or surprise to anyone. The expected happened, New Year’s resolutions died along the way.

Because I have never followed  the trend in detail, I have always guessed the people quit their resolutions only after some months have passed into the year. The reality which I was confronted this year was even more painful. Dreams that were just rising up at the beginning of January were already being put to bed before January has ended.

 

Why is it the resolutions are made to be quit or forgotten? Why do we get so enthusiastic at at the thought of a new beginning,  just to not follow through on our enthusiasm and dreams?

resolutions

 

Matt Hussey, Life Coach, has a theory for it. In his opinion there are 3 big mistakes in approaching the challenge of resolutions:

1) Huge number of resolutions = a level of change that is not sustainable.

This causes us to be so overwhelmed that we cannot do anything anymore from all the things we intended to do. We just become paralyzed.  Instead of slaying one dragon at a time we decide to fight them all at the same time, but of course this is the best recipe to lose the battle all together.

Matt suggests that we should not be over ambitions and choose 1 % change… but that one percent that we know we can carry through.

 

2) Because we believe that New Year comes around once a year.

We wait and put our hopes and  life changes into only one moment of the year. We believe change is tied to a date, which  it is definitely not.  According to Matt the New Year in this sense could come on the first of every month giving us 12 opportunities to reevaluate ourselves. Why should we limit our opportunity of change base on only one day or week or even month of the year? Change is permanent and continuous.

 

3)  Because when we fail at one point along the way, we give up our resolution all together.

We should understand and furthermore expect failure and when it comes we should say to ourselves that failure is normal and get back on track instead of blaming or shaming ourselves into quitting. Only when you quit you have truly failed.

Do you agree with these 3 points? I most certainly do and therefore I am happy  to announce that I am still on track with my diet for this year which I have started 2 weeks ago.I am failing constantly in between but still keeping at it. Keep you updated with the results 🙂

Of course my and your resolutions for this year do not only refer to food or losing weight but it is best to keep the big resolutions to oneself. Why is that? Ok, I will just give you one last resolution trick before I go working on my goals for this year.  Here it goes: when starting working on a new resolution or goal: KEEP IT TO YOURSELF! It has been proven that when you announce your goals, you brain already feels some of the satisfaction of the accomplishment and therefore makes you loose your motivation to still fight for it. So set yourself a silent goal that only you know and come back to everyone at the end of the year with the results instead of the wishes for next year!

 

Now that you have the magic formula, it is time to start over… Happy New Year to you all!  Let’s make a resolution for this year!

 

Sources: Matthew Hussey, 


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